Monday, May 12, 2008

"Bladestorm: The Hundred Years War."

And the 2007-2008 Broken Controller for Worst Voice Acting in a Video Game goes to: "Bladestorm: The Hundred Years War." Playing this battlefield strategy game reminded me of visiting one of those Historical Reenactment villages where everyone is required to be in character. The Barkeep has an unusual preocupation with the mercenary character and his mustache looks like it's glued on.

As a military strategy game, it's ok. But the bad acting and mediocre graphics relegate this thing to the eternal dung heap of PS3 also-rans. After playing it for an hour and a half, I realized there is no hope for it.

Maybe two and one-half buttons out of five? If that.

"Ultimate Mortal Kombat" wouldn't have been possible on the DS unless Nintendo could shove a puzzle game in there. Puzzle Kombat is cute for the first minute or so, but then you realize you're playing a game called "Puzzle Kombat" with a bobble-headed Scorpion. Nintendo could find a way to make "Grand Theft Auto" nauseatingly cute of Rock Star would let 'em.

I gave my friend Death Mammoth posting privleges, so hopefully you'll see some stuff from him in the next couple of weeks.

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